Until beginning of this year, i lived my entire life ashamed of myself, my looks. This was because the people who mattered so much in my life introduced me to myself that i was very ugly and worthless. I did not know any better, and so i believed them.
When more than four people you encounter in your formative years agree on such an issue, it is easy for you to trust them.
That led me to lead my life for others who took advantage of my ignorance and treated me so badly. I assumed i deserved the maltreatment, after all, they were doing me a favour to be part of my life.
Seven years ago i came to the Lord, but unfortunately due to lack of knowledge, as the Bible says, My people perish, i maintained my shame and feeling of unworthiness. Late last year, a neighbour friend introduced me to Bible study fellowship, i have been yearning to study the word. I joined when the study was on the life of Moses, i was amazed to learn that, despite Moses’ baggage, God called him to serve in a very important role. To deliver Gods people from captivity.
I immediately knew that God does not look at our eniquities, He loves us and will go with us on any assignment He gives us. Regardless of our looks. God then healed me of the low self esteem i have carried my whole life.
I realized i need to encourage someone who may be undergoing the same depriving self condemnation.
Just over three weeks ago, my friend, Ruth, who introduced me to BSF passed on suddenly on a bright Sunday afternoon. This sad occurance really jolted me to my core! You can be here one minute and gone in the next! To think that i spent decades looking down upon myself, because of names other mortal humans tagged me, instead of living and celebrating Gods goodness to me, is annoying. But hey, i do not have any more time to waste on negativity! I shall live to please my creator, God! I shall rejoice and be glad for His goodness to me! Am liberated from any condemnation through His son Jesus Christ who died on the cross for me! Alleluia!